Letter to Mom and Dad

Dear Mom and Dad,

We are tired of pretending to hate each other and have decided to run away to the tropics together. Now that we’re older, we think that year-round warm air and sunshine is the best thing. It’s been a good run in Virginia, but we just can’t keep up the pretext of hate any more. We’re actually secret lovers. You tried to raise us as brother and sister, but we’re not really related, after all! Please tell DaisyMae and Bubbles that we didn’t mean to hurt them, but it just wasn’t meant to be.

By the time you wake up, we will be all packed and gone. We took one of your credit cards so you don’t have to worry that we won’t have any money. You’ve been great parents, but it’s time for us to leave the nest and be true to ourselves. Maybe once you get over the shock of what we have done, you can accept us and even come visit.

Goodbye!

Love,
Jake and Bathsheba